Green Eyes...

Lately I've been finding myself less scared, less apprehensive, less worried, that someone will find out about my sexuality. It's been a positive, in my opinion, because it gives me the chance to be more confident and stops me from deterring myself from doing things I would normally want to do. For example, today I bought my first ever gay-oriented magazine. I bought 'Genre'. I wasn't really certain which one to get, there were so many different kinds. But for the first time, I was able to go to the GLBT section, pick up a magazine and look through it and then eventually walk up to the cashier and pay for it. I bought it. I couldn't believe it. Others might feel that it's lame for me to be so proud of such a miniscule accomplishment, but for me it's an incredible feat. The only problem with my purchase today was that I bought last month's issue, rather than the current one. haha. Oh well...

I've also been finding myself more courageous when it comes to other guys. Everyone has experienced that unexpected situation, where you find yourself looking at someone, they in turn look back, and awkward eye contact is made. Prior to my newly found confidence, I would quickly turn away, look down or simply close my eyes altogether(quite unsafe when at the university walking amongst hundreds of other students) when thrust into these awkward moments. Now, I make eye contact and smile or nod to the other guy. Their reactions are not how I had expected them to be. Not one person looked as though they were upset, or raging with anger because they know I'm gay and looking at them. haha. What was I thinking? Rather, I find that much like I was, guys were more shy. They would look away, seeming apologetic even, that they had made eye contact. Others smile back, keep the eye contact and nod as well. It's a great way to turn an otherwise lousy day into a generally good one. I find that when I see someone smiling, laughing, or just looking happy, it makes me feel happy. I don't think I have ever been upset due to a smile flashed across the room in my direction. Have you? And eye contact, to me anyway, just seems to be a great sign of respect and acknowledgement.



I love my newly discovered confidence. You never know, maybe next time I'll actually have the courage to talk to a guy I find is cute and see where it goes, instead of waiting to be introduced to these guys. haha.

Oh, and for a last note, I would like to mention that I have fallen even harder for Anderson Cooper, when I saw a clip of him on 'Regis and Kelly', speaking of his inability to drink hot beverages....just like me!!!! I don't drink coffee or hot chocolate because I just can't drink hot drinks. When someone offers me hot chocolate, I gladly accept the offer, but I ask them if they have any ice. haha. Otherwise, I wait a very, very long time for it to cool before I can take a sip. Here's the clip.



-Donnie Cooper!

P.S...I got my first comments this week. Thank you guys! You made my week... :)